Prop8.

[For Tricia & Michelle ... Dave & Arturo ... and everyone who loves someone.]

No argument in support of the rights of same-sex couples to legally marry could be more eloquent than this.

Please watch this video:



Thank you.

x/RICHARD

Bells for my Belles.

[AKRON]

My friends Tricia & Michelle are trekking out to California to get married later this month.



This is for them:



Thank you guys for everything you've done for me.

I wish you absolutely ridiculous happiness!

x/RICHARD

TAKE-CARE-O

[BIG BUNNY LOVES BOO BEAN - Love never dies]

Whilst plundering through my Gmail online at work this week, I found a message from Ray that I had never seen, never received, that had never downloaded to my Mac.

It was a photo, taken with the camera on his mobile phone, telling me he loved me in ASL ...



Ray would sometimes sign that to me after getting out of the car at work. It was one of our things.

Given the slightly 'secret' nature of our relationship (at least locally in Akron), Ray & I developed many ways of saying 'I love you' to each other. If we were not alone when ending a telephone conversation, we would say "take-care-o" (trailing off on the 'o'). This covert expression of love came from my misunderstanding him saying 'te quiero' a few times -- only to have me respond "you take care, too!"

Ray & I told each other "I love you" often and were both increasingly aware of how each time might be the last time.

If our love was ever a secret, I guess the secret is well & truly out by now.

I don't think Ray would mind me sharing this audio of his voice from October 2007 -- an example of the silly but lovely messages he would leave on my voicemail.

Words can't express how happy I am to have that recording -- or convey the contrasting joy & sadness I feel when it randomly plays on the iPod.

I cherish each little reminder I have of how much he loved me ...



In return, my love for Ray grew to be boundless. The intense amount of time we spent together in his last three months is the most cherished of my entire life. We had achieved a bit of a 'yin/yang', for lack of a better phrase -- and after his coma in December, no moment was taken for granted.

What Ray & I had together was good. It was love -- pure & simple. We chose each other and, while swimming upstream through illness & stresses external to our relationship, we held on to each other.

Life can be cruel & unkind but I have no regrets about coming to Ohio to be with Ray. I know what it means to be wanted, needed, appreciated and truly loved because of Ray Boggs.

No matter where I go in this world, Ray is with me always. Nothing or no one can ever diminish what we shared or take it away. He is a central part of my mind's landscape and I carry his love & kindness in my heart.

I miss you, Ray. I celebrate your life each & every day. And I love you ... whole bunches!

x/RICHARD

==



==

RAY

[AKRON - Updated - See links below]

Ray Boggs, who was my reason for being in Ohio and, indeed, still in America, died Tuesday night after a long battle with a rare liver disease.



At the time of his death, Ray was surrounded by his closest friends, while dozens more waited outside. His mother held his left hand and I held his right as his heart stopped beating ― an honour I will cherish for the rest of my life. Ray was 44 years old.

Ray touched so many lives as a primary school teacher, a colour guard instructor and friend. After 20 years of leading Collage Winter Guard, as well as directing colour guard at various high schools, a virtual family of young women still call him 'daddy'.

Many called him a friend ... some considered him a brother ... his 'kids' called him Mister Boggs ... but to me he will always be my Boo Bean.



Ray will be entombed at Rose Hill Burial Park in Fairlawn, Ohio. He has a 'penthouse' in a mausoleum by the lake, as he wanted, thanks to the generosity of friends.

My heartfelt gratitude goes out to all those who have been there for me in this difficult time, as we strive to celebrate Ray's life, support each other and grieve the loss of our dear friend.

x/RICHARD

==

Read his obituary here.

Read a features article about Ray's life from the Akron Beacon Journal here.

Read the WGI's tribute to Ray here.

Read MEPA's remembrance notice here.

Read the Norton High School Marching Band's memories of Ray here.

Read a transcript of my eulogy for Ray here.

==

Happy Bunny Day

[AKRON - Better the bunny you know ...]

Beware of imitations!



Look for the BIG BUNNY seal of approval ...



Gotta love da' feets!

:-)

x/RICHARD

10 YEARS!

[16 March 1998]

Ten years have passed since I graduated from college at Georgia State University in Atlanta.

My BA is in Minority Relations ... which is, essentially, lots of sociology & psychology paired with minority studies.

In the photo below, I am right of centre about five rows from the back.



Did you spot me?

:-p

This is a glimpse of how I looked ten years ago:



I still have that sweatshirt but it's in storage back in England.

x/RICHARD

20 Years!

[12th March 1988]



The Bank of England withdrew the £1 note from circulation––making way for pound coins.



The soundtrack to this change was a diverse and danceable UK pop chart ... the urban-twinged disco of Yazz & the Plastic Population ... the perfect boy band that was Bros (the brothers Goss) ... the shocking success of twangy but genius Fairground Attraction ... the clever samples & swirling beats of Mark Moore's S'Express ... the further exploration & pop art of the Pet Shop Boys ... and the continuing evolution of pop perfection that was (and is!) Bananarama––still churning out the hits with help from "the new girl", our Jacquie!

x/RICHARD

The 'Ick' Factor

[NOW PLAYING: I Begin To Spin - Dannii Minogue v. Dead or Alive]

WARNING: Lying around for ten days with the bunny lung lurgy can result in a Dannii Minogue-type appearance:



Oh dear gawd! It's the 'gay tilt' ...

That was NOT intentional ... but it did make me laugh.



What a contrast! The picture of me is Photoshop-free and all-natural. Perhaps I should reconsider that.

Tomorrow is a shaving day. Ten days on, I look like a Wookiee ...

Wookiee Minogue?

x/RICHARD

The Bunny Lung Lurgy.

[AKRON - Things *can* always get worse.]

New Year's Eve!



Where were you?

At midnight, London time, I was still in casualty at Akron City Hospital, having just been diagnosed with acute bronchitis. For now, I am on Doxycycline and an Albuterol inhaler. This comes after three days festering in bed with a fever over 39c.

At midnight, Ohio time, I did manage to escape the isolation of my room and sit on the edge of the stairs, a careful distance from Ray who cannot be exposed to my germs. "Happy new year" and then everyone went to bed.

So that's that.



I've a few more days in bed, methinks, so keep those funny online greeting cards coming!

:-)

Thanks.

x/RICHARD

PS - Ray was not home for Xmas but I was with him at Cleveland Clinic from 11 AM till 10 PM. He had a stream of visitors throughout the day and received quite a few lovely presents. Ray was, however, home for Boxing Day.